In the personal growth world, we talk a lot about gratitude. I write about gratitude often myself. But too much gratitude can be too much of a good thing. Being too grateful can keep you from your dreams.
When you are down on your luck or at an in-between place in your life, it’s a good time to count your blessings and be grateful. When you are feeling blue or feeling like others have more, that’s a great time to remember how much you have. Gratitude can get you through some tough times. It can also help straighten out your priorities.
Gratitude is important for happiness in our daily lives. It can remind you that it’s not the material things in this world that create happiness. It’s the way we live our lives, the way we appreciate our family, friends, health, and environment. The way we love.
But you can’t get into the mindset of always feeling grateful and settling for less. Too much gratitude can hold you back — if you let it. In order to be an achiever, you need to be a little restless and lacking to really go for it.
Life coaching is about helping people achieve their dreams. It’s about removing obstacles that hold you back. And sometimes too much gratitude can keep you in the same place for too long.
This next statement may seem controversial.
I was raised as a Catholic, and I’ve always had a problem with the Beatitudes. Blessed are the poor in spirit. Blessed are the meek. The eight Beatitudes are lovely. They were meant to be a gentler guide than the hard-and-fast Ten Commandments of the old testament. But I found when I was growing up that some people misinterpreted them to mean that you should be poor, that you shouldn’t speak up, or that you don’t deserve to have more. Wanting anything more was “putting on airs.” You should be happy with what you’ve got and be grateful. Full stop.
But there’s more to it than your personal happiness.
Too much gratitude can be dangerous.
Our economy is severely unbalanced. There are underemployed people working in big-box stores that make such a low wage they can barely feed their families without assistance. When I talk to them they are grateful to have any kind of job. But that doesn’t make it right. I’m sure these superstores are super grateful that there are so many people they can exploit and get to work for peanuts.
Too much gratitude, too much of an acceptance of the status quo, can stop people from fighting for their rights. It can put a screeching halt to social change.
It’s dangerous because you can start to think that you’re not worth it. You can start to accept that austerity policies that lead to cuts in social programs, pensions and healthcare are a good thing.
Real change only happens when people are restless and in need.
Gratitude is a blessing up to a point.
You should be able to feel happy with whatever you’ve got, no matter where you are in life. But that shouldn’t stop you from wanting to achieve more, as long as you don’t let the pursuit of your dreams make you unhappy.
So practice gratitude. Be happy in your life and appreciate that you have a roof over your head, clean water and food on the table. But don’t rest on your gratitude. There’s always more. You deserve more. And it’s not a sin to go for it.
Very interesting post on gratitude. I have to say I’ve never thought about it this way. You can continue to be grateful for what you have while working towards your dreams. Seems like a good idea to me.
I wasn’t sure how people would take this post. I don’t mean to discount gratitude. It’s just another perspective. Thanks for getting it.
I agree with Angela, this is a novel take on gratitude. The topic pulled me in and I’m still processing the concept after reading the entire post. I’m left wondering if it’s gratitude that’s causing the complacency you reference or if it’s lack of self esteem, low ambition, feeling powerless, etc. instead. Very thought provoking.
Such a powerful message. You are so right, be grateful but don’t settle for less!
Wow!I love how you highlighted the Beatitudes and how some interpret them. As a Christian I believe God wants us to be grateful, but not lazy people or act as doormats. For example, I recently left a job that I was grateful to have. I left because although I was thankful to be employed with benefits, but I wasn’t living – I was existing and unhappy! I stepped out on faith (another word than can be used as an excuse for non-action) to start my own business. I had the financial resources to do so, and for that I am thankful (and grateful). 🙂
Great post- I totally agree especially about being grateful for a low wage job. I sometimes get mad at myself and think, “It’s because you’re not grateful enough” but I see that this restless/go for it gets me where I want to be. Thanks for your thoughtfulness.
Too much gratitude. Who would have thought? Seriously though, I have fallen into this trap. Some people say that we are to be grateful and “not want more.” It is okay to seek more, to do better, to make a bigger impact on others (using our God-given gifts), and to be well paid for that.
Seeking great things is not a sin. I agree.
I really like what you wrote. Yes we can feel grateful for what we have but still pursue our dreams. We all need to be present with what we have but also not settle for where our hearts call us.
That was not controversial at all. That was right on point. Balance is key when it comes to gratitude. Great post!